Yesterday my brother opened his eyes! He has been on two sedation medications since he's been in, but yesterday they took him off of one of them. His eyes had been open for several hours, but he had not responded to any of the nurses stimulation. That is, until he heard my sisters voice, then he looked directly at her. What a thrill! She called me and I'm sure I broke speed records getting up there! Most of the time he was not focusing on anything in particular, but several times while we were talking to him there was a flicker of recognition. Or his brows would furrow in annoyance when one of the many machines he is hooked up to would start beeping. Or when we were talking to him about his kids, he would get a concerned look on his face. Once he looked like he was trying to smile, and another time he looked like he wanted to say something, but it's hard to talk with a huge tube in your throat! I swear we even saw his eyes tear up when we were talking to him. I was giddy with emotion. As I sat and stared into his beautiful, brown eyes this scripture came to mind,
"The light of the body is the eye."
The eyes truly are the windows to the soul, and it was a beautiful experience to peek in and see that his soul is still there.
Friday, July 25, 2008
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Death is all around us...
If you’ve been keeping up with my blog you know that this past week has been very interesting for me. But you don’t know the half of it. Another event that has occurred this week is why I have given this post the title it has. Let me explain.
Five years ago on July 15, my mother passed away. Four years ago on July 17, my father-in-law passed away. This week on July 15 my brother was admitted to the hospital and was hardly expected to make it through the day. And just this past Saturday, on July 19 my grandfather passed away.
So you see, I have been contemplating death a lot lately. And I have also been contemplating why the Lord does things like this. It just seems so uncanny that it all happened this week. Another interesting “coincidence” is that on Sunday in Relief Society the lesson was on death...
One of the questions asked was, “As you think of loved ones who have died or who may soon die, what gospel truths bring you comfort?” As I contemplated that I thought of my mother. I thought of my brother. As my sister and I stood by my brother's bedside on that first frightening day we wondered aloud where my mother was, and even as we wondered we knew the answer. She was right there of course. This was her son, her firstborn. Where else would she be? My answer to the question is that I am grateful for the gospel truth of the sealing power that binds families together forever. Even though she is gone from this life, my mother is still my mother and will always be my mother and no one can take her away. My mother has accomplished more through her death in bringing about a better life for her children. Her presence has been felt many times by different members of our family in their times of need. She is still living and so is my father-in-law and so is my grandpa. And I am eternally grateful for that comforting truth.
Yes, death is all around us, but so is life. Eternal life.
Five years ago on July 15, my mother passed away. Four years ago on July 17, my father-in-law passed away. This week on July 15 my brother was admitted to the hospital and was hardly expected to make it through the day. And just this past Saturday, on July 19 my grandfather passed away.
So you see, I have been contemplating death a lot lately. And I have also been contemplating why the Lord does things like this. It just seems so uncanny that it all happened this week. Another interesting “coincidence” is that on Sunday in Relief Society the lesson was on death...
One of the questions asked was, “As you think of loved ones who have died or who may soon die, what gospel truths bring you comfort?” As I contemplated that I thought of my mother. I thought of my brother. As my sister and I stood by my brother's bedside on that first frightening day we wondered aloud where my mother was, and even as we wondered we knew the answer. She was right there of course. This was her son, her firstborn. Where else would she be? My answer to the question is that I am grateful for the gospel truth of the sealing power that binds families together forever. Even though she is gone from this life, my mother is still my mother and will always be my mother and no one can take her away. My mother has accomplished more through her death in bringing about a better life for her children. Her presence has been felt many times by different members of our family in their times of need. She is still living and so is my father-in-law and so is my grandpa. And I am eternally grateful for that comforting truth.
Yes, death is all around us, but so is life. Eternal life.
Tender Mercies
The days have all run together. It’s been a week since Roger was hospitalized and I don’t know where the time has gone. So many things have happened. So many ups and downs. It’s been an emotional rollercoaster ride for sure!
The official diagnosis is Tularemia, or more commonly “rabbit fever”. It was transmitted to him through a tick bite he received on the 4th of July weekend. While Tularemia is rare, only 200 cases per year, it is highly dangerous, it takes only one organism to cause the disease. If he had gone in within a few days of feeling symptoms, he would have been on antibiotics for a couple of weeks and probably would have been fine.
They have given him antibiotics for the Tularemia and have been able to contain it; however it is all the after effects that he is dealing with now. As a result of it running unchecked in his body he contracted sepsis, which is essentially blood poisoning. He has gone into respitory failure and his kidneys have stopped functioning. The Tularemia has also caused ischemia to occur in some of his fingertips, but the real danger lies in it spreading to his heart; in order to keep that from happening he may have to have the affected ones amputated. They have drawn marks on his fingers to check the progress. He also has some internal bleeding which they are not sure of the cause. He is under sedation right now and on a ventilator and is also receiving dialysis.
It all sounds very dire, but the doctors feel that since he is young (43) and relatively healthy that his chances are good for recovering. The main thing that needs to happen is for his lungs to begin working on their own. The ventilator is taking every breath for him and it is also keeping pressure in his lungs in order to keep them from collapsing. When he was first admitted they had him on 100% oxygen and the pressure level (PEEP) was 20. He is now down to 35% oxygen and the PEEP level is 16. It is the PEEP level that needs to go down to below a 6-8 before they will be able to take him off the ventilator. Most of his recovery depends upon him being able to breathe on his own. His body cannot get the oxygen he needs to his blood and certain organs until he starts to be in control of his breathing.
While his kidneys are still not functioning, there is an 85-90% chance that they will reverse themselves and he will be fine. Years down the road he may have some problems with them, but the doctors say that most of the time, in cases like this, people fully recover their kidney function. He will be kept on dialysis until he is able to begin breathing on his own and his kidneys begin to function again.
He is very bloated as they have to keep a certain amount of fluid in his body in order for his organs to receive the oxygen they need. While it is very uncomfortable, it is not dangerous to him. We were worried that it was what had caused the ischemia, but the doctor reassured us that was not the case. We are hopeful that because the Tularemia has been contained that the ischemia will stop progressing.
That is the medical side of things. On a spiritual note, the Lord has been in our midst throughout this ordeal. Yesterday as I was contemplating the events of the past few days this scripture came to mind:
But behold, I, Nephi, will show unto you that the tender mercies of the Lord are over all those whom he hath chosen, because of their faith. (1 Nephi 1:20)
On Monday our family decided to do another fast for Roger. We gathered together at the hospital so that we could talk to the doctor and get a more detailed analysis of his condition. Since both waiting rooms were full the nurse took us back to the family meeting room in the ICU. The doctor met us there and answered our questions and gave us the information we needed. He then left the room and we were able to discuss what we needed to focus on in our fasting and prayer. We then knelt in a family prayer in his behalf. After the prayer we discussed who would give him a priesthood blessing and made that decision. We were just getting ready to leave when the nurse came back and was very surprised to find us still there. The doctor was supposed to escort us out after he was done, but he had not. I was grateful for that little tender mercy that the Lord showed to us in giving us a private place to gather and plead for the life of our brother. The nurse also allowed us all to go into the room while he was given the blessing, another tender mercy, because only two people are allowed into his room at one time.
Another tender mercy is the fact that I was able to be here at this time. I have felt that the Lord wanted me here to be with my family during this time. Usually in the summer we take our annual trip to British Columbia to go fishing. This year I wanted to visit my family and also go visit the church history sites. A couple of weeks before our trip we decided to cancel the church history tour because of expenses and decided instead to just stay in Oklahoma the whole time. I had been planning on going to Indiana for a week to visit a friend and also my father who lives in Wisconsin, but I got sick so I had put off the trip for a few days. I was sick for two days. On the day that Roger went to the hospital I was feeling better so that I was able to go into his room during those first very frightening hours. Funny little circumstances that kept me here where I needed to be. There have been other, more personal experiences that I have had wherein I know that the Lord is working in this family to bring us closer and to have the opportunity to exercise our faith together on behalf of our brother.
There’s so much that I wish to express, but feel that I need to keep in my heart. My prayer is that my brother will be able to recover and to have the capacity left in his body to fulfill the mission that I know he has still on this earth. I know that the Lord is near and Roger is receiving the spiritual strength that he needs. I pray that I will be able to see him awake before I leave. Please keep him in your prayers, and thank you again for your kind and supportive words.
The official diagnosis is Tularemia, or more commonly “rabbit fever”. It was transmitted to him through a tick bite he received on the 4th of July weekend. While Tularemia is rare, only 200 cases per year, it is highly dangerous, it takes only one organism to cause the disease. If he had gone in within a few days of feeling symptoms, he would have been on antibiotics for a couple of weeks and probably would have been fine.
They have given him antibiotics for the Tularemia and have been able to contain it; however it is all the after effects that he is dealing with now. As a result of it running unchecked in his body he contracted sepsis, which is essentially blood poisoning. He has gone into respitory failure and his kidneys have stopped functioning. The Tularemia has also caused ischemia to occur in some of his fingertips, but the real danger lies in it spreading to his heart; in order to keep that from happening he may have to have the affected ones amputated. They have drawn marks on his fingers to check the progress. He also has some internal bleeding which they are not sure of the cause. He is under sedation right now and on a ventilator and is also receiving dialysis.
It all sounds very dire, but the doctors feel that since he is young (43) and relatively healthy that his chances are good for recovering. The main thing that needs to happen is for his lungs to begin working on their own. The ventilator is taking every breath for him and it is also keeping pressure in his lungs in order to keep them from collapsing. When he was first admitted they had him on 100% oxygen and the pressure level (PEEP) was 20. He is now down to 35% oxygen and the PEEP level is 16. It is the PEEP level that needs to go down to below a 6-8 before they will be able to take him off the ventilator. Most of his recovery depends upon him being able to breathe on his own. His body cannot get the oxygen he needs to his blood and certain organs until he starts to be in control of his breathing.
While his kidneys are still not functioning, there is an 85-90% chance that they will reverse themselves and he will be fine. Years down the road he may have some problems with them, but the doctors say that most of the time, in cases like this, people fully recover their kidney function. He will be kept on dialysis until he is able to begin breathing on his own and his kidneys begin to function again.
He is very bloated as they have to keep a certain amount of fluid in his body in order for his organs to receive the oxygen they need. While it is very uncomfortable, it is not dangerous to him. We were worried that it was what had caused the ischemia, but the doctor reassured us that was not the case. We are hopeful that because the Tularemia has been contained that the ischemia will stop progressing.
That is the medical side of things. On a spiritual note, the Lord has been in our midst throughout this ordeal. Yesterday as I was contemplating the events of the past few days this scripture came to mind:
But behold, I, Nephi, will show unto you that the tender mercies of the Lord are over all those whom he hath chosen, because of their faith. (1 Nephi 1:20)
On Monday our family decided to do another fast for Roger. We gathered together at the hospital so that we could talk to the doctor and get a more detailed analysis of his condition. Since both waiting rooms were full the nurse took us back to the family meeting room in the ICU. The doctor met us there and answered our questions and gave us the information we needed. He then left the room and we were able to discuss what we needed to focus on in our fasting and prayer. We then knelt in a family prayer in his behalf. After the prayer we discussed who would give him a priesthood blessing and made that decision. We were just getting ready to leave when the nurse came back and was very surprised to find us still there. The doctor was supposed to escort us out after he was done, but he had not. I was grateful for that little tender mercy that the Lord showed to us in giving us a private place to gather and plead for the life of our brother. The nurse also allowed us all to go into the room while he was given the blessing, another tender mercy, because only two people are allowed into his room at one time.
Another tender mercy is the fact that I was able to be here at this time. I have felt that the Lord wanted me here to be with my family during this time. Usually in the summer we take our annual trip to British Columbia to go fishing. This year I wanted to visit my family and also go visit the church history sites. A couple of weeks before our trip we decided to cancel the church history tour because of expenses and decided instead to just stay in Oklahoma the whole time. I had been planning on going to Indiana for a week to visit a friend and also my father who lives in Wisconsin, but I got sick so I had put off the trip for a few days. I was sick for two days. On the day that Roger went to the hospital I was feeling better so that I was able to go into his room during those first very frightening hours. Funny little circumstances that kept me here where I needed to be. There have been other, more personal experiences that I have had wherein I know that the Lord is working in this family to bring us closer and to have the opportunity to exercise our faith together on behalf of our brother.
There’s so much that I wish to express, but feel that I need to keep in my heart. My prayer is that my brother will be able to recover and to have the capacity left in his body to fulfill the mission that I know he has still on this earth. I know that the Lord is near and Roger is receiving the spiritual strength that he needs. I pray that I will be able to see him awake before I leave. Please keep him in your prayers, and thank you again for your kind and supportive words.
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Good News!
Thank you for your prayers and uplifting words of support and encouragement. Roger (my brother) is improving. Since he's been in the hospital he has had to have 100% oxygen given to him on a ventilator that was also doing every breath for him. Last night he improved significantly so that today they were able to to take his oxygen input down to 80 percent! His blood pressure had been very low but has now returned to normal, so they have been able to take him off the blood pressure medication which means a reduction in the fluids they were having to give him that were bloating his body. He's still on dailysis for his kidneys, but it's only a temporary thing until his kidneys can begin to function on their own.
I have the most awesome family who have all pulled together for him. There are nine of us all together, six boys and three girls. One brother flew in from Alaska to be here and another flew from San Diego with his wife and thier 9 day old baby (she's a beauty!) to be here. We all fasted for him yesterday. I am blessed to be here with them and to witness the pulling together of our faith in his behalf. We know that our prayers are being heard.
I have the most awesome family who have all pulled together for him. There are nine of us all together, six boys and three girls. One brother flew in from Alaska to be here and another flew from San Diego with his wife and thier 9 day old baby (she's a beauty!) to be here. We all fasted for him yesterday. I am blessed to be here with them and to witness the pulling together of our faith in his behalf. We know that our prayers are being heard.
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Challenging Event
Funny how my last post was on challenging events that can take over your life. I don't have a lot of time to say what I'd really like to say because my vacation has made quite the detour. My big brother is in the hospital in critical condition. He has an infection that has caused sepsis. Last night he was touch and go and was only given a 50/50 chance of making it through the night...but he did, bless his heart. While he is still in very critical condition, the doctor said that she felt the prognosis was better today. We know the Lord is at work here as we have felt his presence many times throughout this ordeal. We believe in miracles and are fasting and praying that his life will be spared. Please think of us and pray for us at this time.
Monday, July 07, 2008
Real Living
"Sadness, disappointment, and severe challenges are events in life, not life itself. I do not minimize how hard some of these events are. They can extend over a long period of time, but they should not be allowed to become the confining center of everything you do...No matter how difficult something you or a loved one faces, it should not take over your life and be the center of all your interest. Challenges are growth experiences, temporary scenes to be played out on the background of a pleasant life." Richard G. Scott, Ensign, May 1996
Isn't this a great quote? It's something I've been thinking a lot about lately. Too many times I have allowed events to take over while I am hovering somewhere over the top looking at my life being played out and not feeling like a participant.
That's all I have to say...just wanted to share the quote!
Isn't this a great quote? It's something I've been thinking a lot about lately. Too many times I have allowed events to take over while I am hovering somewhere over the top looking at my life being played out and not feeling like a participant.
That's all I have to say...just wanted to share the quote!
Sunday, July 06, 2008
Summertime...and the livin' is easy!
Well, once we got to the destination that is.
Have you ever tried to drive across the country with 8 persons, 6 of whom are your kids, stuffed in a car for three days of 12+ hour driving? It is not for the faint of heart!
But now we are here and my kids are connecting with cousins, some of whom they have not seen for over 5 years. It's a slumber party every night! Fortunately I have lots of family here in the midwest, so we can disperse ourselves around and not make anyone too crazy!
We'll be vacationing for about a month, so my blogging life will be sporadic at best, but I'll be checking in when I can.
Hope you all are having an easy livin' summer!
Have you ever tried to drive across the country with 8 persons, 6 of whom are your kids, stuffed in a car for three days of 12+ hour driving? It is not for the faint of heart!
But now we are here and my kids are connecting with cousins, some of whom they have not seen for over 5 years. It's a slumber party every night! Fortunately I have lots of family here in the midwest, so we can disperse ourselves around and not make anyone too crazy!
We'll be vacationing for about a month, so my blogging life will be sporadic at best, but I'll be checking in when I can.
Hope you all are having an easy livin' summer!
Friday, June 27, 2008
For you Nancy Face!
Presenting, for your listening pleasure, dear Daughter #2 singing a rousing rendition of
Ok, well, it's midnight and I had to beg her to perform, so maybe it's not so rousing, but ain't she a cutie!
Thursday, June 26, 2008
It's a CRAZY world!
I won a bloggy giveaway! I've only ever entered two and boy howdy was I shocked to win. It was about a week ago that I found out, but I was gone to Girls Camp so could not post about it until now. Here's the CRAZY place where I won. Just look at all the loot I will be getting! It was The Motherboard's birthday giveaway. What a fun idea to give away a gift for your birthday. (Must remember that for next year.) The fun thing is that I just met The Motherboard about a week before her giveaway. She left a very nice comment on one of my posts. Thank you Motherboard, I'm looking forward to the treats!
Another CRAZY person commented around the same time and I kept getting them mixed up because of the names of their blogs, and the funny thing is, I don't think they knew each other when they named their blogs, but they have a cool connection that you will just have to read about. Take a gander over to their blogs, it's definately worth your time!
I love the blogosphere. You just never know who you are going to bump into!
Another CRAZY person commented around the same time and I kept getting them mixed up because of the names of their blogs, and the funny thing is, I don't think they knew each other when they named their blogs, but they have a cool connection that you will just have to read about. Take a gander over to their blogs, it's definately worth your time!
I love the blogosphere. You just never know who you are going to bump into!
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
Campy Debriefing
I loved going to girls camp as a youth. When I was first married I was the Beehive advisor, so I got to go that one year, but then was never involved with the youth after that...always in Primary. This year was my oldest daughter's last year though, so I called the stake camp director and begged her to let me go! Which they did--I worked in the kitchen all week. It was busy and tiring and my feet were killing me by the end, but it was invigorating to be around all those girls, the energy was astonishing! Oh, and I lost three pounds which was an added bonus!
I missed out on repelling off a 65 foot cliff in the dark (I really did want to go, I was bummed!) because I was busy in the kitchen and the group left before I could get to the meeting place. Part of the reason I was so bummed was because it was my oldest daughter's group who was doing it and I wanted to be there with her. Instead I went back to my tent and cried... but I did get to do some archery and riflery which was a lot of fun. I'm really good at riflery, but archery, well, that's another matter. I have a really nice bruise on my left upper forearm to show for it! I also got to go on a 5 mile hike with my other daughter. It was not the prettiest hike I had ever been on (I was spoiled by going to Yosemite last month), but it was definately good exercise.
The highlight of my week was at the campfire Testimony meeting with our ward and the bishopric. It brought back memories of when I was a fresh new Beehive. That first campfire testimony meeting marked the beginning of my testimony. I clearly remember a feeling enveloping me that I had never felt before and I wondered how I could be crying and feeling good all the way down to my toes all at the same time! I loved watching the girls each take a turn to stand and bear witness to the truthfulness of the things they had been taught, but the very best part was when my 17 year old daughter stood and bore her testimony for the very first time ever. My motherly heart just melted in a pool of tears after that!
I love camp...
Cookie, cookie....
A fun thing about being in the kitchen is the cute song the girls sing for you,
"Cookie, Cookie
Listen while we sing to you!
Cookie, Cookie
Listen while we sing, please do!
Anyone can make a bed,
Anyone can sweep.
But it takes our Cookie to make the things we eat, so
Cookie, Cookie!
Listen while we sing to you."
Listen while we sing to you!
Cookie, Cookie
Listen while we sing, please do!
Anyone can make a bed,
Anyone can sweep.
But it takes our Cookie to make the things we eat, so
Cookie, Cookie!
Listen while we sing to you."
I didn't think about it until later, but my mom (who died about 5 years ago) was called Cookie by her family, so that was kind of a fun connection to be called her name, if only during camp time.
I missed out on repelling off a 65 foot cliff in the dark (I really did want to go, I was bummed!) because I was busy in the kitchen and the group left before I could get to the meeting place. Part of the reason I was so bummed was because it was my oldest daughter's group who was doing it and I wanted to be there with her. Instead I went back to my tent and cried... but I did get to do some archery and riflery which was a lot of fun. I'm really good at riflery, but archery, well, that's another matter. I have a really nice bruise on my left upper forearm to show for it! I also got to go on a 5 mile hike with my other daughter. It was not the prettiest hike I had ever been on (I was spoiled by going to Yosemite last month), but it was definately good exercise.
The highlight of my week was at the campfire Testimony meeting with our ward and the bishopric. It brought back memories of when I was a fresh new Beehive. That first campfire testimony meeting marked the beginning of my testimony. I clearly remember a feeling enveloping me that I had never felt before and I wondered how I could be crying and feeling good all the way down to my toes all at the same time! I loved watching the girls each take a turn to stand and bear witness to the truthfulness of the things they had been taught, but the very best part was when my 17 year old daughter stood and bore her testimony for the very first time ever. My motherly heart just melted in a pool of tears after that!
I love camp...
Cookie, cookie....
Saturday, June 21, 2008
Hot, Sweaty, Tired
Two words will describe my title...
I worked in the kitchen.
I had a blast.
I can't wait to take a shower, use my own bathroom and sleep in my own bed.
And I can't wait to catch up on all my favorite blogs!
Girls Camp!
I worked in the kitchen.
I had a blast.
I can't wait to take a shower, use my own bathroom and sleep in my own bed.
And I can't wait to catch up on all my favorite blogs!
Sunday, June 15, 2008
Happy Father's Day
I've always wondered what it would be like to speak on one of the revered holidays of mothers and fathers. Today I found out. Here's my talk (it's long, so if you make it to the end, you have my undying admiration!):
Today being Father’s Day I was asked to speak on the topic of fathers. I wasn’t given any particular aspect of fatherhood, so as I contemplated on what to focus on my thoughts turned to some of the problems that plague our country and world today. The roles of parents have changed dramatically in the world. With the recent California Supreme Court ruling regarding same sex marriage, groundwork has been laid for the further erosion of the family. The sacred institute of marriage is in jeopardy. The idea of mom’s staying home with their children has long been ridiculed and single parent homes have been on the rise for the last 20-30 years. In a talk given by President James E. Faust in August of 2004 he says:
“Modern sociological studies powerfully reaffirm the essential influence of a caring father in the life of a child—boy or girl. In the past twenty years, as homes and families have struggled to stay intact, sociological studies reveal this alarming fact: much of the crime and many of the behavioral disorders in the United States come from homes where the father has abandoned the children. In many societies the world over, child poverty, crime, drug abuse, and family decay can be traced to conditions where the father gives no male nurturing. Sociologically, it is now painfully apparent that fathers are not optional family baggage.”
He goes on to say,
“One authority states: “Studies show that fathers have a special role to play in building a child’s self-respect. They are important, too, in ways we really don’t understand, in developing internal limits and controls in children.” He continues, “Research also shows that fathers are critical in establishment of gender in children. Interestingly, fatherly involvement produces stronger sexual identity and character in both boys and girls. It is well established that the masculinity of sons and the femininity of daughters are each greater when fathers are active in family life.””
With the changing climate it is even more imperative that we as members of the Church understand our parental roles and what better place to look for a role model than to our own Heavenly Parent.
A careful study of the characteristics and the attributes of God give a person the blueprint that can be used to build their own eternal character. Through the scriptures we are able to find various passages where God has revealed himself to us.
Exodus 34:6 says, “The Lord God, merciful and gracious, longsuffering and abundant in goodness and truth.”
Psalm 103:6,8 says, “The Lord executeth righteousness and judgment for all that are oppressed. The Lord is merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and plenteous in mercy.”
In the Lectures on Faith, Joseph Smith submits that the attributes of God include: knowledge, power (faith), justice, judgment, mercy, and truth. As I thought about each of these attributes, examples of different fathers who exemplified them came to mind. Some are from scripture, some from books, and some are more personally acquainted with me.
Knowledge
D&C 131:6 states, “It is impossible for a man to be saved in ignorance.” Without knowledge of all things God would not be able to save any portion of his creatures. Because he is all knowing, he is able to give us understanding and enlightenment that will help us in our eternal progression.
A quote I often use with my family is, “Ignorance is not not knowing, it’s knowing what isn’t so.” True knowledge is a clear perception of fact, truth, or duty. It is enlightenment.
The Book of Mormon tells us that Nephi, “having been born of goodly parents, therefore I was taught somewhat in all the learning of my father.” We know that Lehi was a “visionary man”, and we know that he shared his dreams with his children, teaching them valuable principles as he expounded on them. Nephi took from the knowledge of his father and asked the Lord for more. I am grateful for that every time I read about the vision of the Tree of Life.
Most children are in awe of their fathers and think they know everything. A favorite comic strip at our house is Calvin and Hobbes. Calvin is always asking his dad questions, and his dad, well, he has answers.
Calvin—Why does the sky turn red as the sun sets?
Dad—That's all the oxygen in the atmosphere catching fire.
Calvin—Where does the sun go when it sets?
Dad—The sun sets in the west. In Arizona actually, near Flagstaff. That's why the rocks there are so red.
Calvin—Don't the people get burned up?
Dad—No, the sun goes out as it sets. That's why it's dark at night.
Calvin—Doesn't the sun crush the whole state as it lands?
Dad—Ha ha, of course not. Hold a quarter up. See, the sun's just about the same size.
Calvin—I thought I read that the sun was really big.
Dad—You can't believe everything you read, I'm afraid.
Calvin—What causes the wind?
Dad—Trees sneezing.
Calvin—How come you know so much?
Dad—It's all in the book you get when you become a father.
Power
In the Lectures on Faith Joseph Smith says, “faith…is the moving cause of all action…without it both mind and body would be in a state of inactivity, and all their exertions would cease, both physical and mental.” “It is the principle by which Jehovah works.” Faith is power.
I never knew a person who worked harder that my Father-in-law. Before and after he retired he was constantly out in the yard working. He had a large garden and a grove of fruit trees that produced a bounty of fruits and vegetables. He worked hard all his life and while he was never rich in the ways of the world, he was able to provide for his family in more than just temporal ways by teaching his sons the value of work. Through his example he taught his sons faith. Faith that through their own hard work they would be able to determine the quality of the life they lived.
Fathers have been given the blessing of holding the priesthood which is a source of strength and power. I have been plagued with allergies since I was a young girl. I hated the beginning of school because it coincided with the onset of hayfever for me. The first couple of months of school my eyes were red and puffy and I was completely miserable. My school pictures always reflected that as they were taken usually within the first month. Before school started each year my father would give me a blessing. I remember one year I was particularly stressed about my allergies. I wanted my dad to bless me that they wouldn’t bother me, but I didn’t know if it was ok to ask for that so I didn’t say anything. However, in the blessing he did ask that my allergies not be so severe, thus stating the desires of my heart. From that blessing and others he gave me I gained a testimony of the power of the priesthood and the strength that it can bring into our lives.
Justice
Justice is the virtue which consists in giving to everyone what is his due; it is practical conformity to the laws and to principles of rectitude in the dealings of men with each other.
I love the Christmas carol, “I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day” The last stanza says,
“Then pealed the bells more loud and deep, God is not dead, nor doth he sleep. The wrong shall fail, the right prevail With peace on earth, good will to men.”
Laman and Lemuel were perpetually murmuring that life was not fair. Nephi, on the other hand, didn’t murmur. He turned to the Lord for answers and for help. In response the Lord says, “ Blessed art thou, Nephi, because of thy faith, for thou hast sought me diligently, with lowliness of heart. And inasmuch as ye shall keep my commandments, ye shall prosper…and inasmuch as thy brethren shall rebel against thee, they shall be cut off from the presence of the Lord. And inasmuch as thou shalt keep my commandments, thou shalt be made a ruler and a teacher over thy brethren.” (1 Nephi 1:19-22)
That prophecy came to pass. We can see the consequences of these different approaches to fatherhood throughout the Book of Mormon. Nephi’s posterity had continual access to the light of the gospel, while Laman and Lemuel’s posterity were ignorant of the blessings withheld from them because of the choices of their fathers.
“Live so that when your children think of fairness and integrity, they think of you." (H. Jackson Brown Jr.)
Judgment
The attribute of judgment gives power to the mind for the exercise of faith and confidence in God, and they are “enabled by faith to …wade through all the tribulations and afflictions to which they are subjected…believing that in due time the Lord will come out in swift judgment against their enemies.” (Lectures on Faith)
Psalm 37:28 says, “For the Lord loveth judgment, and forsaketh not his saints; they are preserved for ever.”
There is nothing that gets my husband’s ire up more than the thought that one of his children may be in danger or has had their feelings hurt in some way. He would move heaven and earth to keep his children safe.
Mercy
Mercy is that benevolence, mildness or tenderness of heart which disposes a person to overlook injuries, or to treat an offender better than he deserves; it implies benevolence, tenderness, mildness, pity or compassion, and clemency, but exercised only towards offenders. Mercy is a distinguishing attribute of the Supreme Being.
My sister tells a story which illustrates how my father applied the principle of mercy.
“When I was a teenager, I used to ask to borrow money from him so I could go out with my friends. He'd give me ten or twenty, reluctantly, and I'd smile and leave. Once I asked to borrow money again. He took out a piece of paper from his desk, tallied up the total, and asked me if I really wanted to borrow this. "Of course," I said. "Well then," he proceeded, "when do you plan to pay this back?" I stopped for a moment to think. I didn't realize I actually had to pay it back. I was a little shocked at this question, which he quickly picked up on. He then went on to explain that if I didn't intend to pay it back, then I should ask if I could 'have' ten dollars instead of 'borrow' ten dollars. If I asked to borrow it, then he wrote it down, expecting that it would be paid back. I then said, "I don't have the money to pay all of that back, so could I just have some money tonight?" He smiled and handed over ten dollars. I liked this arrangement much better. He decided to relinquish my debt and tossed the paper in the trash. His point had been made, and this little lesson taught me that he was actually a pretty cool guy.”
A merciful father seeks to understand his children and shows love through mercy.
Truth
Truth implies fidelity; constancy; steadfastness; faithfulness.
In the Book of Mormon, we have the account of Alma, the son of Alma, being numbered among the rebellious and doing all manner of iniquity. Alma the father prayed with much faith that his son would come to a knowledge of the truth. If you will recall an angel came and rebuked Alma,
“Nevertheless he cried again, saying: Alma, arise and stand forth, for why persecutest thou the church of God? For the Lord hath said: This is my church, and I will establish it; and nothing shall overthrow it, save it is the transgression of my people."
“And again, the angel said: Behold, the Lord hath heard the prayers of his people, and also the prayers of his servant, Alma, who is thy father; for he has prayed with much faith concerning thee that thou mightest be brought to the knowledge of the truth; therefore, for this purpose have I come to convince thee of the power and authority of God, that the prayers of his servants might be answered according to their faith.” (Alma 27:13-14)
When Alma the Younger recovered from this experience, he was a changed man. He was appointed as the first chief judge by King Mosiah and went on to rule in righteous judgment. Later in his life he gives wonderful counsel to his sons Shiblon and Corianton instructing them in the ways of truth and righteousness.
If fathers would study and strive to develop these attributes within themselves, many of the ills of the world would be rectified. One of my favorite time periods in the Book of Mormon is after Christ’s visit which is written about in 4 Nephi. It is a relatively short period of time, only 200 years and only comprises one chapter, but I imagine that it was a time during which fathers (and mothers) embodied these attributes.
“And the Lord did prosper them exceedingly in the land…And they were married, and given in marriage, and were blessed according to the multitude of the promises which the Lord had made unto them…And it came to pass that there was no contention among all the people, in all the land because of the love of God which did dwell in the hearts of the people… And how blessed were they! For the Lord did bless them in all their doings."
I am eternally grateful that I had a loving, caring, devoted father while growing up. I went through a period of struggle in my youth as most of us have. I was working and since I didn’t have my own car my parents would take me and pick me up. My dad liked to do it because it was an opportunity for us to spend time together. He wasn’t a particularly talkative man, but he was a good listener and when he did speak he instructed me in ways of truth. Those times are precious to me because he has since become inactive in the church, yet his teachings in my youth laid the foundation for the kind of person I have become and the faith that I am able to exercise in my own life.
My husband is everything I could have wished for in a father. He embodies many of the attributes that I have talked about. I think my kids would say that he is a “fun” dad. He keeps the mood light in our home through his banter and jokes. He loves his children more than anything else and shows that through his actions.
I’m also eternally grateful for my Father in Heaven and his Son, Jesus Christ. Knowing their attributes give me a feeling of total trust and confidence and also a great measure of comfort. This assurance spills over into my prayers, for I know that whatever I stand in need of, God has the power & knowledge to fulfill.
I testify of the truthfulness of these things in the name of our Savior, Jesus Christ. Amen.
Today being Father’s Day I was asked to speak on the topic of fathers. I wasn’t given any particular aspect of fatherhood, so as I contemplated on what to focus on my thoughts turned to some of the problems that plague our country and world today. The roles of parents have changed dramatically in the world. With the recent California Supreme Court ruling regarding same sex marriage, groundwork has been laid for the further erosion of the family. The sacred institute of marriage is in jeopardy. The idea of mom’s staying home with their children has long been ridiculed and single parent homes have been on the rise for the last 20-30 years. In a talk given by President James E. Faust in August of 2004 he says:
“Modern sociological studies powerfully reaffirm the essential influence of a caring father in the life of a child—boy or girl. In the past twenty years, as homes and families have struggled to stay intact, sociological studies reveal this alarming fact: much of the crime and many of the behavioral disorders in the United States come from homes where the father has abandoned the children. In many societies the world over, child poverty, crime, drug abuse, and family decay can be traced to conditions where the father gives no male nurturing. Sociologically, it is now painfully apparent that fathers are not optional family baggage.”
He goes on to say,
“One authority states: “Studies show that fathers have a special role to play in building a child’s self-respect. They are important, too, in ways we really don’t understand, in developing internal limits and controls in children.” He continues, “Research also shows that fathers are critical in establishment of gender in children. Interestingly, fatherly involvement produces stronger sexual identity and character in both boys and girls. It is well established that the masculinity of sons and the femininity of daughters are each greater when fathers are active in family life.””
With the changing climate it is even more imperative that we as members of the Church understand our parental roles and what better place to look for a role model than to our own Heavenly Parent.
A careful study of the characteristics and the attributes of God give a person the blueprint that can be used to build their own eternal character. Through the scriptures we are able to find various passages where God has revealed himself to us.
Exodus 34:6 says, “The Lord God, merciful and gracious, longsuffering and abundant in goodness and truth.”
Psalm 103:6,8 says, “The Lord executeth righteousness and judgment for all that are oppressed. The Lord is merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and plenteous in mercy.”
In the Lectures on Faith, Joseph Smith submits that the attributes of God include: knowledge, power (faith), justice, judgment, mercy, and truth. As I thought about each of these attributes, examples of different fathers who exemplified them came to mind. Some are from scripture, some from books, and some are more personally acquainted with me.
Knowledge
D&C 131:6 states, “It is impossible for a man to be saved in ignorance.” Without knowledge of all things God would not be able to save any portion of his creatures. Because he is all knowing, he is able to give us understanding and enlightenment that will help us in our eternal progression.
A quote I often use with my family is, “Ignorance is not not knowing, it’s knowing what isn’t so.” True knowledge is a clear perception of fact, truth, or duty. It is enlightenment.
The Book of Mormon tells us that Nephi, “having been born of goodly parents, therefore I was taught somewhat in all the learning of my father.” We know that Lehi was a “visionary man”, and we know that he shared his dreams with his children, teaching them valuable principles as he expounded on them. Nephi took from the knowledge of his father and asked the Lord for more. I am grateful for that every time I read about the vision of the Tree of Life.
Most children are in awe of their fathers and think they know everything. A favorite comic strip at our house is Calvin and Hobbes. Calvin is always asking his dad questions, and his dad, well, he has answers.
Calvin—Why does the sky turn red as the sun sets?
Dad—That's all the oxygen in the atmosphere catching fire.
Calvin—Where does the sun go when it sets?
Dad—The sun sets in the west. In Arizona actually, near Flagstaff. That's why the rocks there are so red.
Calvin—Don't the people get burned up?
Dad—No, the sun goes out as it sets. That's why it's dark at night.
Calvin—Doesn't the sun crush the whole state as it lands?
Dad—Ha ha, of course not. Hold a quarter up. See, the sun's just about the same size.
Calvin—I thought I read that the sun was really big.
Dad—You can't believe everything you read, I'm afraid.
Calvin—What causes the wind?
Dad—Trees sneezing.
Calvin—How come you know so much?
Dad—It's all in the book you get when you become a father.
Power
In the Lectures on Faith Joseph Smith says, “faith…is the moving cause of all action…without it both mind and body would be in a state of inactivity, and all their exertions would cease, both physical and mental.” “It is the principle by which Jehovah works.” Faith is power.
I never knew a person who worked harder that my Father-in-law. Before and after he retired he was constantly out in the yard working. He had a large garden and a grove of fruit trees that produced a bounty of fruits and vegetables. He worked hard all his life and while he was never rich in the ways of the world, he was able to provide for his family in more than just temporal ways by teaching his sons the value of work. Through his example he taught his sons faith. Faith that through their own hard work they would be able to determine the quality of the life they lived.
Fathers have been given the blessing of holding the priesthood which is a source of strength and power. I have been plagued with allergies since I was a young girl. I hated the beginning of school because it coincided with the onset of hayfever for me. The first couple of months of school my eyes were red and puffy and I was completely miserable. My school pictures always reflected that as they were taken usually within the first month. Before school started each year my father would give me a blessing. I remember one year I was particularly stressed about my allergies. I wanted my dad to bless me that they wouldn’t bother me, but I didn’t know if it was ok to ask for that so I didn’t say anything. However, in the blessing he did ask that my allergies not be so severe, thus stating the desires of my heart. From that blessing and others he gave me I gained a testimony of the power of the priesthood and the strength that it can bring into our lives.
Justice
Justice is the virtue which consists in giving to everyone what is his due; it is practical conformity to the laws and to principles of rectitude in the dealings of men with each other.
I love the Christmas carol, “I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day” The last stanza says,
“Then pealed the bells more loud and deep, God is not dead, nor doth he sleep. The wrong shall fail, the right prevail With peace on earth, good will to men.”
Laman and Lemuel were perpetually murmuring that life was not fair. Nephi, on the other hand, didn’t murmur. He turned to the Lord for answers and for help. In response the Lord says, “ Blessed art thou, Nephi, because of thy faith, for thou hast sought me diligently, with lowliness of heart. And inasmuch as ye shall keep my commandments, ye shall prosper…and inasmuch as thy brethren shall rebel against thee, they shall be cut off from the presence of the Lord. And inasmuch as thou shalt keep my commandments, thou shalt be made a ruler and a teacher over thy brethren.” (1 Nephi 1:19-22)
That prophecy came to pass. We can see the consequences of these different approaches to fatherhood throughout the Book of Mormon. Nephi’s posterity had continual access to the light of the gospel, while Laman and Lemuel’s posterity were ignorant of the blessings withheld from them because of the choices of their fathers.
“Live so that when your children think of fairness and integrity, they think of you." (H. Jackson Brown Jr.)
Judgment
The attribute of judgment gives power to the mind for the exercise of faith and confidence in God, and they are “enabled by faith to …wade through all the tribulations and afflictions to which they are subjected…believing that in due time the Lord will come out in swift judgment against their enemies.” (Lectures on Faith)
Psalm 37:28 says, “For the Lord loveth judgment, and forsaketh not his saints; they are preserved for ever.”
There is nothing that gets my husband’s ire up more than the thought that one of his children may be in danger or has had their feelings hurt in some way. He would move heaven and earth to keep his children safe.
Mercy
Mercy is that benevolence, mildness or tenderness of heart which disposes a person to overlook injuries, or to treat an offender better than he deserves; it implies benevolence, tenderness, mildness, pity or compassion, and clemency, but exercised only towards offenders. Mercy is a distinguishing attribute of the Supreme Being.
My sister tells a story which illustrates how my father applied the principle of mercy.
“When I was a teenager, I used to ask to borrow money from him so I could go out with my friends. He'd give me ten or twenty, reluctantly, and I'd smile and leave. Once I asked to borrow money again. He took out a piece of paper from his desk, tallied up the total, and asked me if I really wanted to borrow this. "Of course," I said. "Well then," he proceeded, "when do you plan to pay this back?" I stopped for a moment to think. I didn't realize I actually had to pay it back. I was a little shocked at this question, which he quickly picked up on. He then went on to explain that if I didn't intend to pay it back, then I should ask if I could 'have' ten dollars instead of 'borrow' ten dollars. If I asked to borrow it, then he wrote it down, expecting that it would be paid back. I then said, "I don't have the money to pay all of that back, so could I just have some money tonight?" He smiled and handed over ten dollars. I liked this arrangement much better. He decided to relinquish my debt and tossed the paper in the trash. His point had been made, and this little lesson taught me that he was actually a pretty cool guy.”
A merciful father seeks to understand his children and shows love through mercy.
Truth
Truth implies fidelity; constancy; steadfastness; faithfulness.
In the Book of Mormon, we have the account of Alma, the son of Alma, being numbered among the rebellious and doing all manner of iniquity. Alma the father prayed with much faith that his son would come to a knowledge of the truth. If you will recall an angel came and rebuked Alma,
“Nevertheless he cried again, saying: Alma, arise and stand forth, for why persecutest thou the church of God? For the Lord hath said: This is my church, and I will establish it; and nothing shall overthrow it, save it is the transgression of my people."
“And again, the angel said: Behold, the Lord hath heard the prayers of his people, and also the prayers of his servant, Alma, who is thy father; for he has prayed with much faith concerning thee that thou mightest be brought to the knowledge of the truth; therefore, for this purpose have I come to convince thee of the power and authority of God, that the prayers of his servants might be answered according to their faith.” (Alma 27:13-14)
When Alma the Younger recovered from this experience, he was a changed man. He was appointed as the first chief judge by King Mosiah and went on to rule in righteous judgment. Later in his life he gives wonderful counsel to his sons Shiblon and Corianton instructing them in the ways of truth and righteousness.
If fathers would study and strive to develop these attributes within themselves, many of the ills of the world would be rectified. One of my favorite time periods in the Book of Mormon is after Christ’s visit which is written about in 4 Nephi. It is a relatively short period of time, only 200 years and only comprises one chapter, but I imagine that it was a time during which fathers (and mothers) embodied these attributes.
“And the Lord did prosper them exceedingly in the land…And they were married, and given in marriage, and were blessed according to the multitude of the promises which the Lord had made unto them…And it came to pass that there was no contention among all the people, in all the land because of the love of God which did dwell in the hearts of the people… And how blessed were they! For the Lord did bless them in all their doings."
I am eternally grateful that I had a loving, caring, devoted father while growing up. I went through a period of struggle in my youth as most of us have. I was working and since I didn’t have my own car my parents would take me and pick me up. My dad liked to do it because it was an opportunity for us to spend time together. He wasn’t a particularly talkative man, but he was a good listener and when he did speak he instructed me in ways of truth. Those times are precious to me because he has since become inactive in the church, yet his teachings in my youth laid the foundation for the kind of person I have become and the faith that I am able to exercise in my own life.
My husband is everything I could have wished for in a father. He embodies many of the attributes that I have talked about. I think my kids would say that he is a “fun” dad. He keeps the mood light in our home through his banter and jokes. He loves his children more than anything else and shows that through his actions.
I’m also eternally grateful for my Father in Heaven and his Son, Jesus Christ. Knowing their attributes give me a feeling of total trust and confidence and also a great measure of comfort. This assurance spills over into my prayers, for I know that whatever I stand in need of, God has the power & knowledge to fulfill.
I testify of the truthfulness of these things in the name of our Savior, Jesus Christ. Amen.
Friday, June 13, 2008
To die for...
Last night I had White Chocolate Caramel Macadamia Nut Cheesecake for dessert from The Cheesecake Factory. A mouthful to say and a mouthful of Heaven! Sadly this isn't a picture of the Heavenly creation, this is the White Chocolate Raspberry Truffle...I think I'll try that next time!
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
Double Trouble
Who...us?
When they were younger we referred to them as Thing 1 & Thing 2, you know, from Dr. Suess's Cat in the Hat. They were quite the pair making messes from one end of the house to the other.
They still keep me hopping, but they aren't quite so messy anymore. In fact, their room is the cleanest in the house. They make their bed every day and do their chores almost without being reminded to. They are constantly giving me kisses and hugs. They make me laugh daily.
I think I'd be blue without Thing 1 & Thing 2.
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Feeling Good and Looking Better!
I got an email from my piano teacher this afternoon that made my day...or rather made my whole week...month...year?
Here's what she wrote:
"So I am having classes today, discussing the pros and cons of the kid’s recital experiences…when these 4 girls from your recital were discussing your Cristofori’s Dream they said they heard you were a mom! They couldn’t believe it because “she was so young and pretty, she didn’t look like a mom at all!” I thought they were talking about [your daughter], so I reiterated that [she] is the teenage daughter with the pretty long brown hair, but they said, “no, we’re talking about the girl who played 2 songs.” It was a crack up to me when I told them you were a mom, (& not a teenage mom), because you have 3 teenagers yourself. They couldn’t believe it. It kept me smiling through the afternoon….so I just had to share it!
Go have a YOUNG evening, will you?"
I usually get told that I look about 10 years younger than I am, but boy howdy, am I feeling good now!
Here's what she wrote:
"So I am having classes today, discussing the pros and cons of the kid’s recital experiences…when these 4 girls from your recital were discussing your Cristofori’s Dream they said they heard you were a mom! They couldn’t believe it because “she was so young and pretty, she didn’t look like a mom at all!” I thought they were talking about [your daughter], so I reiterated that [she] is the teenage daughter with the pretty long brown hair, but they said, “no, we’re talking about the girl who played 2 songs.” It was a crack up to me when I told them you were a mom, (& not a teenage mom), because you have 3 teenagers yourself. They couldn’t believe it. It kept me smiling through the afternoon….so I just had to share it!
Go have a YOUNG evening, will you?"
I usually get told that I look about 10 years younger than I am, but boy howdy, am I feeling good now!
Monday, June 09, 2008
What's your Guilty Pleasure?
That's rhetorical, so please don't answer!
I had an interesting conversation with my MIL the other day. She was telling me about this TV show that she loves to watch. It’s a bit of a racy program and she said, “Oh, I know there’s some stuff in it that’s, well, kind of “hmm hmm” (her way of saying a little too much of the s3x*y stuff), but the bond these ladies have is why I really love to watch it.”
Now I love my MIL dearly, so this post is nothing against her, but her comment got me to thinking about something that I had just read in Pilgrim’s Progress. Pilgrim’s Progress is an allegory of a man’s search for the Celestial City(salvation). Christian, the hero of the story is on a journey to find the Celestial City and on his way he meets up with many temptations, threats and dangers. He finds a companion named “Hopeful” who also wishes for the Celestial City. They are directed to the path and given a Note of Direction. They are also warned about the “Flatterers”, nevertheless when they are at a crossroad and not sure which way to go a man “black of Flesh, but covered with a very light Robe, came to them, and asked them why they stood there?” They told him they were on their way to the Celestial City, but didn’t know what road to take. He told them to follow him, so they do, and consequently are led into a net where they become entangled. It is at this point that the “White robe fell off the black man’s back” and they finally recognize that they’ve been duped. They are helpless until a Shining One comes to their rescue.
When I first read that part, I was mad at them for following. It was obvious to me that they should have questioned who he was and where he intended leading them. But as I contemplated it further I thought of how sly the adversary is. He only has to “cloak” something in an appealing attire to entice us. They did recognize that the man was of “black flesh”, but the White Robe made them feel comfortable enough to follow and it was only after they became entangled in the net that he revealed himself.
My MIL’s show is all about friendship; women falling in and out of love, helping each other through the rough spots of life, day to day situations that we can identify with, scenes played out in hilarious, touching and sentimental ways—and before you know it, these women are like your best friends. You have to keep up with them; you have to know what happens to them each week.
But beneath the cloak lies the risqué. We may feel a little squeamish through some of those scenes, but we’re grown-ups. We can handle that kind of stuff right?
I’m definitely a guilty party here. I have watched shows that a friend terms a “guilty pleasure”. Last year I got hooked on a series. I had to watch it every week and I also got the DVD’s from Netflix so I could catch up and understand what was going on. I watched for a few weeks, but then noticed that my home felt a little dark. I couldn’t put my finger on what it was. I kept feeling like I needed to send the DVD’s back without watching them. I put it off for a bit, but finally I prayed about it and the impression was pretty strong. I’ve found through experience not to ignore those impressions, so I sent them back. Immediately the feeling in my home changed. It was like something heavy left. I try not to think about what my home would be like had I ignored the impression and watched the programs.
I will admit to another "guilty pleasure". My computer. It's now 12:44 am and I should be in bed...
Goodnight!
Sunday, June 08, 2008
Be Still and Know That I am God
I'm so glad today is over.
My girls and I all take piano from the most fabulous teacher. Everytime after our lesson I tell my girls, "When I grow up I want to be just like Sister____________. She is very encouraging and positive even when she is critiquing your work. And she's always smiling. I love people who always smile.
Anyway, back to why I'm glad this day is over. Today was our piano recital. I was playing two pieces, one by myself and one as a duet with my eldest daughter. I had practiced and practiced my own piece, but there were two parts that every single time I played them, I messed up. I would go back and work on just those parts over and over and over again, only to come back and mess up. The other struggle was that my daughter was at EFY all last week, so we were not able to practice our duet together until this morning! Let's talk about stress here...no, let's not!
I prayed, we prayed, my husband gave us blessings. We perservered and improved. Before the recital I said another prayer and asked that our minds would be quickened and our hands able to remember the notes, but I forgot to ask for one specific thing.............I forgot to ask that my hands not shake.
They shook.
So much so that EVERYONE noticed, and EVERYONE commented on it afterward.
I played my solo piece first and was so devastated with my shaking hands that I was unsure if I would be able to perform the duet with my daughter. So I prayed and as I was praying I remembered something I had read recently. It was from the 23 Psalm..."He leadeth me beside the still waters." I asked that my hands be made still and the words that came into my mind were, "Be still and know that I am God."
Our turn came and even though we made a few mistakes, my hands were calm.
I love it when the Lord answers right away.
But I'm still glad this day is over!
My girls and I all take piano from the most fabulous teacher. Everytime after our lesson I tell my girls, "When I grow up I want to be just like Sister____________. She is very encouraging and positive even when she is critiquing your work. And she's always smiling. I love people who always smile.
Anyway, back to why I'm glad this day is over. Today was our piano recital. I was playing two pieces, one by myself and one as a duet with my eldest daughter. I had practiced and practiced my own piece, but there were two parts that every single time I played them, I messed up. I would go back and work on just those parts over and over and over again, only to come back and mess up. The other struggle was that my daughter was at EFY all last week, so we were not able to practice our duet together until this morning! Let's talk about stress here...no, let's not!
I prayed, we prayed, my husband gave us blessings. We perservered and improved. Before the recital I said another prayer and asked that our minds would be quickened and our hands able to remember the notes, but I forgot to ask for one specific thing.............I forgot to ask that my hands not shake.
They shook.
So much so that EVERYONE noticed, and EVERYONE commented on it afterward.
I played my solo piece first and was so devastated with my shaking hands that I was unsure if I would be able to perform the duet with my daughter. So I prayed and as I was praying I remembered something I had read recently. It was from the 23 Psalm..."He leadeth me beside the still waters." I asked that my hands be made still and the words that came into my mind were, "Be still and know that I am God."
Our turn came and even though we made a few mistakes, my hands were calm.
I love it when the Lord answers right away.
But I'm still glad this day is over!
Friday, June 06, 2008
Bring on Summer...I'm Ready!
I have a hot new job! Well a hot new cool job. Actually it's hot for me, cool for the kids...
Here's where I'm working for the summer...
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I'm working at a water park! Cool huh? Well, like I said, cool for the kids, because they get to be there while I get to sweat my socks off serving hamburgers and pizzas! I work for the catering department. We set up and serve for the group events. My shift usually runs from 10-1:30ish, so on the days I work, my older kids come with me and play, and my MIL brings my younger two over around 1:30 and then I don my suit and we play until the park closes! I only have to work a total of 12 shifts over the summer to get the very COOL benefits--a summer pass for each member of my family! Usually we get to go only one time each summer, as a day pass costs $25.00 per person, or a summer pass is $80.00. Multiply that by 8 and, well, you see why we only get to go once per season. But not THIS year! We can go as often as we want...so often that we might even get sick of it...NOT!
Thursday, May 29, 2008
The End of All Things
I love the end of May. It signifies the end of the school year, the end of seminary, the end of dance lessons, the end of baseball, the end of trapshooting, the end of piano lessons, the end of endless chauffering of kids from here to there and everywhere. Right around the middle of May I get tired...very, very tired. I start thinking about next year and trying to figure out how I can stop the endless running around. I wish I lived on a farm, way out in the country, away from all the "life enriching" activities that I think my kids need.
I've been taking an online class where we read, study and discuss great literature and inspiring documents. The first document we discussed was Your Refined Heavenly Home, by Douglass L. Callister. I love this speech. Actually, I don't love this speech. Well, I do and I don't! It's an amazing speech that has caused me to take a closer look at the environment of my home. I love it because it has caused me to really think about my home and how conducive it is to cultivating the type of refinement that he talks about. And I don't love it because taking a closer look is painful! I so desire to have a "Refined Heavenly Home", but I have a looooong way to go!
I believe the first step to having a home where refinement can grow is to have a home that is ordered. I grew up in a home without order. There was constant clutter everywhere. I craved order, but did not know how to get it. Sometimes the only place in my home that was clean was the bathroom floor. I would take my book into the bathroom and sit on the floor to read. When I grew up I determined that I would have an ordered home. However, I was not taught good habits and consequently it has taken me years to understand how to order my home. In fact, I am still trying to figure it out. My problem, well one of many, is consistency. I start something, but can never follow through to completion.
One of my favorite scriptures is from Abraham 4:18. After completing their creations on the fourth day, “...the Gods watched all these things which they had ordered until they obeyed.” First the Gods put the elements in their place, then they watched them to see that the elements stayed. This does not mean they just sat and watched the elements, it also does not mean they forced the elements to obey. They would have had to keep making corrections and fine tuning things until the elements completely understood their place. The Gods prepared a place of order before introducing flesh on the earth. They created a beautiful place that refinement could then take place in.
See, that's what I'm not good at. The fine tuning. My world would have been one of chaos because I would have gotten everything in place and then...well actually it wouldn't have even gotten to that stage. I would have planned everything, had it written up on paper with umpteen charts, graphs, and illustrations...and then stopped.
But I keep trying. I can give myself credit for that. This week I have been going through my house area by area, purging and organizing; putting everything in place. I have such a strong desire to change. Over the past year I have been changing and learning and growing...minutely, but still progressing. I will perservere!
Go read the article and then tell me what you think.
I've been taking an online class where we read, study and discuss great literature and inspiring documents. The first document we discussed was Your Refined Heavenly Home, by Douglass L. Callister. I love this speech. Actually, I don't love this speech. Well, I do and I don't! It's an amazing speech that has caused me to take a closer look at the environment of my home. I love it because it has caused me to really think about my home and how conducive it is to cultivating the type of refinement that he talks about. And I don't love it because taking a closer look is painful! I so desire to have a "Refined Heavenly Home", but I have a looooong way to go!
I believe the first step to having a home where refinement can grow is to have a home that is ordered. I grew up in a home without order. There was constant clutter everywhere. I craved order, but did not know how to get it. Sometimes the only place in my home that was clean was the bathroom floor. I would take my book into the bathroom and sit on the floor to read. When I grew up I determined that I would have an ordered home. However, I was not taught good habits and consequently it has taken me years to understand how to order my home. In fact, I am still trying to figure it out. My problem, well one of many, is consistency. I start something, but can never follow through to completion.
One of my favorite scriptures is from Abraham 4:18. After completing their creations on the fourth day, “...the Gods watched all these things which they had ordered until they obeyed.” First the Gods put the elements in their place, then they watched them to see that the elements stayed. This does not mean they just sat and watched the elements, it also does not mean they forced the elements to obey. They would have had to keep making corrections and fine tuning things until the elements completely understood their place. The Gods prepared a place of order before introducing flesh on the earth. They created a beautiful place that refinement could then take place in.
See, that's what I'm not good at. The fine tuning. My world would have been one of chaos because I would have gotten everything in place and then...well actually it wouldn't have even gotten to that stage. I would have planned everything, had it written up on paper with umpteen charts, graphs, and illustrations...and then stopped.
But I keep trying. I can give myself credit for that. This week I have been going through my house area by area, purging and organizing; putting everything in place. I have such a strong desire to change. Over the past year I have been changing and learning and growing...minutely, but still progressing. I will perservere!
Go read the article and then tell me what you think.
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Pass the tissues please
"Slowly he took out the clothes in which ten years before, Cosette had left Montfermeil...he was remembering...he arranged the little things on the bed, the scarf next to the skirt, the stockings beside the shoes, the bodice beside the dress, and he looked at them one after another...She was no taller than that...she laughed, they walked along holding hands, she had nobody but him in the world.
Then his venerable white head fell on the bed, this old stoical heart broke, his face was swallowed up, so to speak, in Cosette's clothes, and anybody who had passed along the staircase at that moment would have heard irrepressible sobbing."
(Um yes, irrepressible sobbing...beginning on page 1384 and lasting until the end of the book...)
Then his venerable white head fell on the bed, this old stoical heart broke, his face was swallowed up, so to speak, in Cosette's clothes, and anybody who had passed along the staircase at that moment would have heard irrepressible sobbing."
(Um yes, irrepressible sobbing...beginning on page 1384 and lasting until the end of the book...)
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